Royal Marsden Hospital

On 19Th June afternoon Christian was taken to RMH in Sutton by ambulance, his dad went with him. I had to go home and pack my suitcase ( men are useless in packing :). We were told we will have to stay for 2-3 weeks there.

I rushed back to hospital just in time for Christians arrival. I can only describe walking in to the ward as walking in to another world unknown and frightening. And it has become our world now. I can describe it as living in this bubble, life outside goes on, but not ours, ours have stoped, our life is all about getting Christian through this and we know that even when it is all over our lives will never be the same.
I was so scared and didn't know if I will be strong enough to deal with seeing other seriously ill children with cancer,seeing Christian go through all the procedures and pain, but when you in that situation, you have no choice, but to deal with it and to be strong for your little boy. And that is what we are doing, being strong and positive and believe that everything will turn out right.

I am very emotional person and would cry seeing ill children on the television and now we were in that situation and it was happening to our child.

Christian has more blood tests and still has fluids going in his blood to prepare him for upcoming chemo therapy.

On 20Th June he has to have his bone marrow to see what kind of Leukaemia he has. I didn't even know there were different types. He has to have general anaesthetic for this procedure, it was very disturbing, but he was fine afterwards. The tests show that he has Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia, the most common type in children and most treatable.

I must say it never crossed my mind "why us?", " why my child?" ...it's like saying why mine why not somebody's else child.. , because nobody , no child deserves to have cancer ..

On 21St was the first night I slept . Wake up feeling numb that's how I can describe, completely numb, but with inner strength and realisation that I am strong enough and I will do what ever it takes to pull my son through this..and we are going to beat it.

Dina ( Adonis cousin) and Sebastian came to visit, Adonis has tonsillitis so was told to stay away for couple of days. Sebastian seemed fine , he did not understand what was happening and
thinks Christian has got chicken pox. Bless him:)

Doctor came to explain what was going to happen, what treatment he is about to have, side effects. I have already read numerous times through all the information leaflets, it seemed like a whole new language, very hard to take it all in, but I and Adonis wanted to know as much as possible. It made us feel more in control, more confident about the whole situation.

On 22ND Sebastian and Paris ( my brother in law) came to visit. Adonis still not well. Christian was very excited to see his brother. He is so active, it is a challenge to keep him on the bed ( he still has fluids going in) , I look at him and can not believe he is ill. He does not look ill at all and I was shocked to know that he had only few weeks left if he hadn't been treated.

Christian has to have blood tests every four hours and it is a struggle to find a vein to put cannula in. He has one in his foot now and it was the only one they could find.

It takes me, Adonis, nurse and doctor to put cannula in. He is so strong, he cries so much until he is all sweaty and it makes my heart brake.

On 23 June Adonis came to visit, he is better now. Christian is fine just crying a lot when he has his blood taken. He also had his heart checked and it is OK. He has been a bit bad tempered from steroids his taking, but we don't mind.

On 24Th June Christian is going in to the theatre to have his port inserted. It allows easy access to his blood and also for giving chemo and other medicines. We are happy in a way , because I don't think I can take any more his crying when they trying to find a vein. It should all be easier now. He also is having Lumbar Puncture ( chemo in his spinal fluid).
It all went well, Christian was screaming after he wake up from general anaesthetic, but calmed down after an hour.